why can't I do this?

I am rubbish at SGD,
Day 1 should have been 400, I binged and ate a huge 1200! burn't 600 on the exercise bike.
Day 2 should have been 300, I stuck to 300 but only because I had the day off and spent 6 hours with a friend so only had coffee with him and fruit at home. burn't 300 on the bike
today, day 3 should have been 400, I had a massive 1500! purged what was left in my stomach when I got home from work but wasn't a lot then burn't 600 on the bike.

I need to do better than this. xmas meal is 2 weeks away and my dress is just about fitting around my belly and thighs, I need to lose and simply can not afford to gain. Weighed this morning and i'm back up to 113, this can't happen.
A big part of the problem is work, There is food every where (today I was the cook so it was even easier to cheat myself), I just don't seem to have any self control any more. it's also that time of the month again which always make me want to eat and sweet and stodgy food in particular.

I have just made food to take to work with me tomorrow, chopped cucumber and satsumas for snacking in the morning, bean salad for lunch and chopped mixed peppers and satsuma for snacking in the afternoon-550 calories and hopefully having this to hand will stop me reaching for the biscuits and cake like today, (although I must say that the sticky ginger cake with vanilla drizzle I made today was very yummy, wish I was a crap cook, it would be so much easier!)

If anyone has any tips for keeping motivated and in contol I would love to hear them. I have a picture of a skinny girl with awsome ribs as wall paper on my phone to look at, also write all my calorie intakes on my phone through out the day so I don't lose track. Try chewing gum to stop me eating but my jaw just ends up hurting after a few hours and the acid build up in my stomach makes me feel hungry, ant-acids only help for a short time....
I'm running out of ideas.

Tomorrow I will wear an elastic band round my wrist and snap it against my skin when ever I think about eating anything I shouldn't, try to train my brain to associate fat foods with pain.

fingers crossed and I hope you are doing a lot better that I currently am with your intakes

xabbix